Arses Quotes,

"Analytically speaking, Sigmund Freud talked out of his arse" Dean Cavanagh. IMG
"If I could dance like the ladies can, it would have been my arse on your screens" Lily Allen. IMG
"Not that i had a big arse but even that was toned." Benedict Cumberbatch. IMG
"The only thing I wouldn't do is sell my arse." Tony Abbott. IMG
"The only thing I get from the theatre is a sore arse." John Lahr. IMG
"Tony Abbott would do anything but sell his arse" Tony Windsor. IMG
"The other man's arse is always cleaner!" Stephen Fry. IMG
"You must have stuck a finger up your arse at least once." Noel Fielding. IMG
"Whoever designed this frigging map was having a laugh. Just around the corner, my arse." Freya Stark. IMG
"It takes a bomb under his arse to make Hitler see logic." Joseph Goebbels. IMG
"Having just had a baby, I'm not going to be thinking about my arse." Kate Winslet. IMG
"That is NOT the arse of a 7million player!" Eamon Dunphy. IMG
"Dance music was on its arse before we came along." Sergio Pizzorno. IMG
"I thought the fart was a human thing. It's something to do with like, arse cheeks, or whatever." Karl Pilkington. IMG
"I've always wanted to kick a duck up the arse" Karl Pilkington. IMG
"I'm at the age where i don't have to kiss arse or play nice!" Sharon Osbourne. IMG
"The word arse is as much god as the word face. It must be so, otherwise you cut off your god at the waist." D H Lawrence. IMG
"As for Gordon Brown - I've described him and Blair as two cheeks of the same arse." George Galloway. IMG
"I could be a bit of a pain in the arse. Since I've come out of my cancer, I must say I intend to be even more of a pain in the arse." Harold Pinter. IMG
"I'll tell you what pressure is. Pressure is a Messerschmitt up your arse. Playing cricket is not." Keith Miller. IMG
"I'd like to have a business card saying: Bruce Norris kicked your arse." Robert Muchamore. IMG
"Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse but enough about Kanye West." Stewart Francis. IMG
"The greatest monarch on the proudest throne is obliged to sit upon his own arse." Benjamin Franklin. IMG
"A politician is an arse upon which everyone has sat except a man." E E Cummings. IMG
"Destiny can sometimes be history coming back to bite you in the arse." Hal Duncan. IMG
"I've been a poser for f-ing years. I say, pose your arse off. You know, have a laugh." Billy Connolly. IMG
"I always try to remember that praise and a slap on your back is only 6 inches away from a kick up the arse!" Anthony Foley. IMG
"Yeah, arrest that man on the crime of having 8 Chicken McNuggets stuck up his arse." Dwayne Johnson. IMG
"I worked in Harrods as a sales girl and I was so lazy, I just sat on my arse all day. Now I have huge respect for shop girls. It was boring, so I tried to shoplift things, but we'd always get our bags checked." Susannah Constantine. IMG
"It's interesting to see the dislocation between how people perceive a person visually. Apparently on the radio I'm blonde with a big arse." Tamsin Greig. IMG
"You're about as useful as a one-legged man at an arse kicking contest." Rowan Atkinson. IMG
"One day, maybe not in the next few weeks, but certainly in the conceivable future, someone will be able to refer to me without using the word 'arse' somewhere in the sentence." Nick Hornby. IMG
"I'd like to think that I'd helped people all over the world to question the things they otherwise would have accepted as the truth. I'd also like to think that I'd charmed them a bit with my lovely vocal stylings and the baring of my lovely arse." Marilyn Manson. IMG
"I do ride a bicycle occasionally, but not those stupid stationary ones you see in gyms. I do have one of those, I must confess, but its quite literally a pain in the arse, so I dont use it." Christine Mcvie. IMG
"People who are willing to get off their arse to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually." Billy Connolly. IMG
"I'm a big fan of the Mars Bar Diet. You don't eat the Mars bar, you stick it up your arse and let a rottweiler chase you home." Billy Connolly. IMG
"When you look at pornography, the women become objects, whereas what I'm trying to do is make the person in the photograph as important as their body. And obviously, I like tits and arse, because I just do. I like the sex of taking photographs." Rankin. IMG
"There's no way I'm going to put myself through Sandhurst and then sit on my arse back home while my boys are out fighting for their country." Prince. IMG
"I am naive. I make mistakes - But I don't give a rat's arse how I am perceived!" Shirley Manson. IMG
"To plunder, to lie, to show your arse, are three essentials for climbing high." Aristophanes. IMG
"Well, we went through a lot of names. But seeing as, musically, I wanted to swing through the jungle baring my arse, I thought Gorillaz was a perfect name." Murdoc Niccals. IMG
"There are two things you can be certain of: dying and getting the arse as a football coach." Royce Hart. IMG
"Is man a savage at heart, skinned o'er with fragile Manners? Or is savagery but a faint taint in the natural man's gentility, which erupts now and again like pimples on an angel's arse?" John Barth. IMG
"A Duke couldn't have the arse hanging out of his trousers when meeting foreign diplomats. Actually even plain old Sam Vimes never had the arse hanging out of his trousers, either, but no one would have actually started a war if he had." Terry Pratchett. IMG
"All my friends seem to be smart arses. Don't ask me why. Like many things, it is what it is." Markus Zusak. IMG
"Young people can be disruptive and screw up classes. But even if they are being a pain in the arse it's a cry for help - they don't feel like they are being listened to." Jamie Oliver. IMG
"People who got on their feet and freaked about were called idiot dancers. and nobody wants to be called an idiot dancer. But the whole idea of rock and roll is to get people off their arses - that's what it's about." Steve Marriott. IMG
"The shrill voices of those who give orders Are full of fear like the squeakings of Piglets awaiting the butcher's knife, as their fat arses Sweat with anxiety in their office chairs.... Fear rules not only those who are ruled, but The rulers too." Bertolt Brecht. IMG
"I am struck by the way people behave on the Tube. They look at each other beadily and inquisitively, and something goes on in their thoughts which must be equivalent to the way dogs and other animals, when they meet, sniff each other's arses and nuzzle each other's fur." Graham Swift. IMG
"There's no way I'm going to put myself through Sandhurst and then sit on my arse back home while my boys are out fighting for their country." Prince. IMG
"If you covered a broom handle with oil and shoved it up my arse, then put me on a trampoline, in a lift, I could write a better song on the walls." Dylan Moran. IMG
"'St. Elmo's Fire' is one of my favorite films. I like the storytelling of those teenage American films. You don't get that now. Teenage American movies are all about sick jokes, puking a lot, arse jokes." James Mcavoy. IMG
"It is quite an achievement. People of liberal sympathies, stupefied by relativism, have become the apologists for a creedal wave that is racist, misogynist, homophobic, imperialist, and genocidal. To put it another way, they are up the arse of those that want them dead." Martin Amis. IMG
"Everyone thinks I'm a smart arse who can solve any bloody problem. I'm not. I'm just a very old businessman and a very experienced businessman who made every mistake in the book and can recognise one when I see one." John Harvey-Jones. IMG
"I've played hockey most my life and I've never been badly injured...Three weeks into curling I've got bone chips in both my elbows. I still can't lean on a table. I've even got curling injuries, believe it or not, just from falling on my arse." James Allodi. IMG
"Even the most Bush-happy, flag suckling jack-arse knows deep-down inside that something is wrong. America is over and everyone knows it. The New World Order has a dying empire odor and changing the channel ain't going to make this go away." Jello Biafra. IMG
"A Halloween-haired, Sachsgate-enacting, estuary-whining, glitter-lacquered, priapic berk How dare I, from my velvet chaise longue, in my Hollywood home like Kubla Khan, drag my limbs from my harem to moan about the system? A system that has posited me on a lilo made of thighs in an ocean filled with honey and foie gras'd my Essex arse with undue praise and money." Russell Brand. IMG
"There's a gang of boys on bikes blocking the road ahead. They've got their hoods up, cigarettes shielded. The sky's a really strange colour and there's hardly anyone else about. I slow right down. "What shall I do?" "Reverse," Zoey says. "They're not going to move." I wind down the window. "Oi!" I yell "Move your arses!" They turn languid, shift lazily to the edge of the road and grin as I blow kisses at them. Zoey looks stunned, "What's got into you?" "Nothing- I just haven't learned reversing yet." Jenny Downham. IMG
"I grew up having to piss in a bucket 'cos there was no indoor shitter, and now I have these computerised Japanese super-loo things that have heated seats and wash and blow-dry your arse at the touch of a button. Give it a couple of years and I'll have a bog with a robot arm that pulls out my turds, so I don't have to strain." Ozzy Osbourne. IMG
"All anyone really needs to know about barbed wire is that it can tear the arse out of your trousers, give a cow a good fright, entangle a Yorkshire terrier for life, and is nasty stuff made by greedy men." Billy Connolly. IMG


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