FUNNY OXYMORON QUOTES

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"Tell them to stand closer apart." Samuel Goldwyn. IMG
"I never liked you, and I always will." Samuel Goldwyn. IMG
"We learn from history that man can never learn anything from history." Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel. IMG
"The budget was unlimited, but I exceeded it." Donald Trump. IMG
"I was always an independent, even when I had partners." Samuel Goldwyn. IMG
"The scene is dull. Tell him to put more life into his dying." Samuel Goldwyn. IMG
"Hegel was right when he said that we learn from history that man can never learn anything from history." George Bernard Shaw. IMG
"Don't worry about the war. It's all over but the shooting." Samuel Goldwyn. IMG
"Spare no expense to save money on this one." Samuel Goldwyn. IMG
"Any man who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined." Samuel Goldwyn. IMG
"You should always live within your income, even if you have to borrow to do so." Josh Billings. IMG
"The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep." W C Fields. IMG
"I don't think anyone should write their autobiography until after they're dead." Samuel Goldwyn. IMG
"You'd be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap!" Dolly Parton. IMG
"If I could drop dead right now, I'd be the happiest man alive." Samuel Goldwyn. IMG
"I never put on a pair of shoes until I've worn them at least five years." Samuel Goldwyn. IMG
"I never said most of the things I said." Yogi Berra. IMG
"Give me a smart idiot over a stupid genius any day." Samuel Goldwyn. IMG
"A bachelor's life is no life for a single man." Samuel Goldwyn. IMG
"A verbal contract isn't worth the paper it's written on." Samuel Goldwyn. IMG
"Why don't they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff." Steven Wright. IMG
"It usually takes me more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech." Mark Twain. IMG
"Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours." Yogi Berra. IMG
"Always remember you're unique Just like everyone else." Cheyenne McCray. IMG

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