Quotes by Oliver Herford

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A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often. more...

A rolling stone gathers no moss, but it gains a certain polish. more...

Many are called but few get up. more...

Modesty: the gentle art of enhancing your charm by pretending not to be aware of it. more...

When I go abroad I always sail from Boston because it is such a pleasant place to get away from. more...

A man is known by the silence he keeps. more...

The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scotts as a joke, but the Scotts haven't seen the joke yet. more...

Darling: the popular form of address used in speaking to a member of the opposite sex whose name you cannot at the moment remember. more...

Cat: a pygmy lion who loves mice, hates dogs, and patronizes human beings. more...

There is always room at the top - after the investigation. more...

Tact: to lie about others as you would have them lie about you. more...

Age, like distance lends a double charm. more...

Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure. more...

Only the young die good. more...

What is my loftiest ambition? I've always wanted to throw an egg at an electric fan. more...

A man must love a thing very much if he not only practices it without any hope of fame and money, but even... without any hope of doing it well. more...

There are more fish taken out of a stream than ever were in it. more...

My wife has a whim of iron more...

Diplomacy: lying in state. more...

I heard a bird sing In the dark of December A magical thing And sweet to remember. 'We are nearer to Spring Than we were in September,' I heard a bird sing In the dark of December. more...

Some take their gold in minted mold, and some in harps thereafter, but give me mine in bubbles fine and keep the change in laughter. more...

Diplomacy is living in state. more...

Gather kittens while you may, Time brings only sorrow; And the kittens of today; Will be old cats tomorrow. more...

Bigamy is one way of avoiding the painful publicity of divorce and the expense of alimony. more...

If some people got their rights they would complain of being deprived of their wrongs. more...

To babble is to make a feminine noise somewhat resembling the sound of a brook, but with less meaning. more...

An epicure is one who gets nothing better than the cream of everything but cheerfully makes the best of it. more...

Children, behold the Chimpanzee: He sits on the ancestral tree From which we sprang in ages gone. more...

Tact is to lie about others as you would have them lie about you. more...

Actresses will happen in the best regulated families. more...

Song is the licensed medium for bawling in public things too silly or sacred to be uttered in ordinary speech. more...

A hair in the head is worth two in the brush. more...

Why and Wherefore set out one day, To hunt for a wild Negation. They agreed to meet at a cool retreat On the Point of Interrogation. more...

Here's to old Adam's crystal ale, Clear sparkling and divine, Fair H2O, long may you flow, We think your health (in wine). more...

The bubble winked at me, and said, You'll miss me brother, when you're dead. more...

Children, behold the Chimpanzee; He sits on the ancestral tree From which we sprang in ages gone. I'm glad we sprang: had we held on, We might, for aught that I can say, Be horrid Chimpanzees to-day. more...

The Elf and the Dormouse UNDER a toadstool crept a wee Elf, Out of the rain to shelter himself. Under the toadstool, sound asleep, Sat a big Dormouse all in a heap. Trembled the wee Elf, frightened and yet Fearing to fly away lest he get wet. To the next shelter-maybe a mile! Sudden the wee Elf smiled a wee smile. Tugged till the toadstool toppled in two. Holding it over him, gaily he flew. Soon he was safe home, dry as could be. Soon woke the Dormouse-"Good gracious me!" "Where is my toadstool?" loud he lamented. -And that's how umbrellas first were invented. more...

I would like to throw an egg into an electric fan. more...

Actresses will happen in the best-regulated families. more...

A pest is a person who can talk like an encyclopedia, and does. more...

Alas! my child, where is the Pen That can do justice to the Hen? Like Royalty, she goes her way, Laying foundations every day, Though not for Public Buildings, yet For Custard, Cake and Omelette.... No wonder, Child, we prize the Hen, Whose Egg is Mightier than the Pen. more...

The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scots as a joke, but the Scots haven't got the joke yet. more...

A kiss is a course of procedure cunningly devised, for the mutual stopage of speech at a moment when words are superfluous. more...

I sometimes think the Pussy-Willows grey Are Angel Kittens who have lost their way, And every Bulrush on the river bank A Cat-Tail from some lovely Cat astray. more...


Quote Oliver Herford oliver-herford-quotes-959.png Return To All Oliver Herford Quotes Return To All Oliver Herford Quotes Oliver Herford Quote Oliver Herford Oliver Herford quotes and sayings Oliver Herford: Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned ... Oliver Herford

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